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Observe the dress code of the ball. If in doubt, dress conservatively or call the information number in advance. You are at the ball to have fun, but in both conversation and behavior be conservative; you are not in a rowdy smoke filled honky-tonk. The man should escort the lady out onto the dance floor to dance and escort her back to her seat after the dance. Among unattached single people, either the man or the lady can ask for a dance, and either can choose to accept or decline as they see fit. Do not feel that you must accept just to be polite; there too few dances to waste any of them. However, if a lady declines an invitation from a man, she should not presume that he will ask her again later the same evening. This article is about annual balls. The considerations for weekly social dances are different. If a lady declines invitations from a particular man three weeks in a row, he will probably not ask again for several years. If a man wishes to dance with a married lady, he must ask the husband's permission to ask the wife. If there is a march where a single file of couples march counter-clockwise around the floor, the man is on the left holding his right hand up at the level of the lady's shoulder holding the lady's left hand. When dancing a Viennese waltz, go to the center of the floor if either partner wants a rest or cannot move with the traffic. Some of the waltzes last 12 minutes, so it is not unusual to need a rest. The outer part of the floor is where the main line of dance is. Rocking back and forth to the major beats of the music is a good way to rest. Dancing the Viennese waltz takes much more coordination than driving a car. Do not burden a sober partner with your clumsy self if you have had more than a glass of wine. It is best not to drink at all. Ask for sparkling cider or grape juice instead. Some balls are non-smoking events. Even at the others there is almost no smoking. Don't come expecting to smoke. When dancing the Viennese Waltz, do not bump into or even graze other couples. Apologize if you do. If the floor is packed with jostling couples, do not attempt the Viennese Waltz. This may occur during the Emperor Waltz, because it starts with a march that tends to get everyone on the floor at once. If either a man or a lady lands a partner who dances in an uncontrolled or bizarre manner, do not take risks, insist on going to the center to rock this one out, or to leave the floor and quit the dance. One time I politely continued to do the Viennese Waltz with a lady who was bounding up and down with greatly exaggerated rise and fall; it resulted in a fall. Do circulate and meet people. This is a rare opportunity to meet others who share some of your tastes. If you do not have an assigned table to sit at, bring something to mark your spot while you are dancing. Your shoe bag will do if you have nothing better. Do not get upset with someone if they innocently take your chair when you did not leave an item of clothing or something to mark your place at the table. It is their chair now. An exception to this rule: if there are not enough chairs for the number of people, put your things on the table or in the cloakroom, not in the chair. In this case you do not want to claim a chair; anyone who needs a rest between dances is welcome to use any chair. Do not attempt to break up a dancing couple in the middle of a dance and substitute yourself for one of the partners; that always seems to happen in social dances depicted in movies, but practically never happens at real social dances, and would be very rude. If a man attempts to cut in, the dancing couple should refuse and send him away. Since 1920, etiquette books in the USA have permitted cutting in on the dance floor. This makes absolutely no sense, and I have not found it permitted in earlier etiquette books. If adversaries of dance did not pay for the advertising of cutting in in movies and etiquette books, they should have. It is hard to think of anything that would better serve to dampen male enthusiasm for learning to dance. The ball you attend may include a formal dinner. In addition to the plate in front of you there may be additional food and drinks in plates, bowls and glasses to the left and right of your plate. Which is yours, and which belongs to the person next to you? The drinks to the right of your plate are yours, and the food to the left of your plate is yours. There may be a confusing array of silverware. The silverware to be used first is on the outside to left and right of your plate. Use from the outside in. The dessert silverware will be at the far side of the plate.